I just found out that May 4th is International Respect for Chickens Day. Man, I wish I had known sooner; how’s a girl to plan? After all, our chickens are special creatures. They expect that little something extra and, foolish pretend farmers that we are, we have become putty in their beaks, particularly since the whole we-descended-from-dinosaurs thing.
Take this guy for instance. Even though he’s an incubated-on-premises rooster with questionable lineage, he thinks he’s all that. One movie night (hey, they watched them in “Chicken Run”), he saw Harry Potter and the something or other and decided his hero was Lucius Malfoy, the cad. 
Ever since, he’s been wearing his feathers like this and doing his best to become a dark wizard. The jokes on him though; he hasn’t even figured out how to disappirate yet and wand holding? Let’s just say challenges lie ahead for him.
Our other rooster, Guinness, isn’t far behind Lucius in the ego department. As he is named after the very best of beers and, in particular, the most attractive of stouts (can you say cascading goodness? I knew you could), he struts his stuff as if he were the second coming. To top that, he has no respect for the hens and takes them at his will and whimsy. He’s like the villain in a bad romance novel, towering over his harem of hens, their breasts heaving, their beaks open and panting (or maybe it’s just the heat, damned if it isn’t in the nineties already).
The hens handle the abuse remarkably well, thanks to treats throughout the day such as tomato tops, half-eaten-by-Pint apples, and melon rinds. They also get alfalfa in the morning to supplement their regular layer pellets. The eggs they lay (a full dozen yesterday!) are lovely and tasteful and are their special way of rewarding us for our non-lustful attentions.
I like chickens, and yes, even respect them. If you had 15 dinosaur descendents in your yard, you’d respect them, too.
You’ll have to excuse me now. I have to start planning a “fowl” celebration (Shhh, I think I’ll make it a surprise. Chickens just love it when you jump out and scream at them.)
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